It is with great urgency that I share with you a breach that has compromised all of our exhibits. As many of you know, energy-emitting crystals were discovered at the Children’s Museum of Houston during our 2009 expansion. As recommended by the U.S. Department of Geosciences, we kept the crystals in our possession for research and testing, with the energy from the crystals being routed throughout the Museum’s exhibits. The crystals have remained safe and secure as we’ve worked to determine how the energy may be harnessed for the betterment of all – UNTIL NOW.
In recent weeks, the Museum has endured several attempts to steal the crystals and their energy. While we don’t have all of the information, we do know that the organization responsible is calling itself the Ridiculously Intelligent Villainous Agent League a.k.a. R.I.V.A.L. They are under the leadership of a very villainous (and annoying) man named Arcturus Vex, who wants to harness the crystals’ energy for his own schemes.
Although we’ve tried our best to ward off this infiltration on our own, the “situation” has escalated, and a decision has been made to enlist only the highest qualified agents. The Special Elite Crime Resolution and Espionage Team a.k.a S.E.C.R.E.T, led by Director Hank Angstrom (this guy knows what he’s doing) will take on the difficult task of defeating R.I.V.A.L.
We are putting a callout for agents, ages 8 and up, to help us protect the Museum. Recruiting for S.E.C.R.E.T is underway, and agents will begin their assignment on November 21. Agents may report to duty at the Museum’s Top Secret Gear Shop.
To ensure the integrity of the Children’s Museum of Houston, we are asking for your cooperation in keeping this “situation” confidential. Mr. Angstrom has assured us that there will be minimal interruption to our daily work routines once the assignment commences on November 21. As always, if you have any questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to direct them to any of our leaders within the organization.
P.S. If any of you happen to run into that Arcturus guy, tell him that IT IS ON.